The Importance of Faith-based Living in Your Child’s Life
Next to loving care and providing the necessities for life, you can not offer your child a greater preparation for life (and the afterlife) than to provide them with a faith-based relationship with God through Jesus Christ. The role of church attendance is also a major part in their foundation in the Word of God and the values, guidance, and identity that your child will need to navigate through life’s storms with victory. Throughout the journey of raising five children, Gary and I have not always been able to offer our children everything we wanted to give to them, but one thing we have always been able to share with our children is “faith” in God and His Word. I believe that has actually been the single greatest contributing factor to the wonderful results we have seen in their lives as they are growing into adults and serving God with their whole heart. I can honestly say that their childhood, every step of the way, has been a joyful experience. Now don’t misunderstand, as parents, we have had to help them navigate through some choices or a few transitions, but their childhoods have all been an amazing time and I wouldn’t trade anything for it. We never referred or viewed any of the stages you hear people warn you of as a rough or hard time. We refused to “buy-in” to what we believed was almost spoken like a curse over the developmental years of a child. “Terrible two’s, bratty twelve yr olds, ungrateful teens, etc. escaped our family! How? Faith, love and a different picture than peer dependency and Disney can offer! I’m not bashing Disney, but you don’t want your 13 yr old daughter trying to kiss every cute boy in school! That’s another discussion....
Show Love and Stability
I do recognize that children have important transitions in their lives and we need to offer them a faith-based decision process that’s rooted in more than rules and regulations, but rather is based on a God that loves them and has set up values and the “right” way to live based on His Love. Restrictions, rules and tough judgmental attitudes have plagued many people’s views of raising children in the “church” world. Actually children need a mix of love, training (which by the way, is modeling life for them) and discipline. If you leave any one of the three out, love, training, or discipline, your child will not be balanced in their faith and life. A few practical ways to do this are: Give your child books and movies about Jesus; read stories about the Bible; pray with them about issues or things that are important to them; point them to scriptures (based on their age) that address the challenges they face and help translate it into practical application with them. Let your child see your faith in action and your stand on God’s Word in difficult times. Children must see faith working for you, in your home and world for them to want to adopt it as their lifestyle as adults. In other words, faith must offer them and you real answers to life!
Watch Your Words
As parents, we refused to “buy-in” to the terrible twos; we didn’t ever agree with saying such things about our child. We saw each of their years as precious and a time to train, discipline and most importantly, love them. Matthew 11 talks about if we believe in our heart and say whatever we believe, we shall have those things we believed. If we expect our children to rebel, and we speak those things, then according to the Word of God, we have enacted a spiritual law. That child will be what we believe about them. Parents are God ordained authorities in the life of their child, called to protect them from evil, and train them in the way they should go. We should protect our children from evil words and pronouncements over their lives just as strongly as we would protect them from a predator. The Bible says that Satan roams about as a roaring lion, seeking WHOM he may devour, resist him steadfast in the faith. As parents we must speak “life-giving words” to our children, and over our children. Life and death are in the power of the tongue! A child will live up to the words that a parent says to them. NEVER, NEVER call your child derogatory names, tease them about attributes or their physical appearance. Speak God’s promises to them and about them and share the love, acceptance, and forgiveness that they have in Christ Jesus. They won’t want to let you or God down in their behavior. All children will make childish mistakes, immature decisions, and sometimes even be disobedient, but their heart will remain soft, moldable, and with loving discipline, they will grow up into amazing individuals with the purpose of God for their life as their heart beat.
Faith Should Be Rewarding
At Faith Life Church, we have created a fun place for children to experience God, His Love, and destiny for their lives. God is not mad, but is rather a loving Father, who wants the best for our children. They need to see Him that way! In your home and in the church you attend extend God’s love and His desire to restore must be greater than the rules that so often become the emphasis of church or faith in God. There is certainly a place for teaching children the consequences of bad decisions, and to use discipline when your child willfully chooses to disobey (not just making a childish mistake like spilling their drink). The purpose of discipline is to separate our child from disobedience and train them that wrong decisions have consequences, and then to restore them to a place of right-standing with you and with God. Never shame your child, belittle them, lose your temper or yell at them. If you do slip and make a mistake, take responsibility, apologize to your child and resume your position of authority without losing confidence in your God-given calling to raise your child “in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.” We made many mistakes as parents, but we tried to always be humble, let our children see our heart for them (and God’s heart for them). We have also felt is was super important to see that a life of faith is rewarding. We teach them (Hebrews 11:6) that God exists, and He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him. They have seen His reward in our home and life. We work hard and play hard as a family and we reward our children with fun, vacations, and laughter during family moments. This is their picture of God. Today they have grown into young people who honor God and their parents and they truly have a heart for His Kingdom because they know that He has a heart for them.
